Raccoon Eviction Notice

Dear Raccoon,

This is an Eviction Notice for you to get out of my property as soon as possible.

I do not want to poison you; I do not want to trap you; I do not want to hurt you. I insist, however, that you move out.  This is firm. This is non-negotiable.



The first time I saw your kind was up in the Central Coast near Hearst Castle. We were in an hotel room, and as I looked outside I saw a mother with her babies, and honestly, I found them very cute.  I thought that "bandido" look was fetching.

But then you showed up in my backyard and started eating my gold fish, including my two-year-old beauties. That caused a serious rift between us. I can't even have fish outside any more because you've taken to visiting my yard regularly to raid my fish pot.

But this recent destruction of our tile roof and what we suspect may be your intrusion into our attic is unacceptable!

MoVE OuT!

FueRa de AQui!


Aside from this Eviction Notice, I have given you other gentle hints to move on: blaring music, bright light, mothballs, and Uncle Ian's Repellent (which has --- oh my, dried blood and chilies). If dried blood and chilies don't work, I'll look for fox urine or Raccoon Eviction Fluid, which I hear are also effective in booting you out.

You have a week, after which I will have to resort to more drastic measures.

I'm sending this Eviction Notice to the Universe in hopes that your mental antennae get the vibes and the message.


Truly Yours,
Cecilia
~~

Read also
My Battle with the Raccoons
House and Garden the San Miguel Allende Way
Bees and My Pride of Madeira Bush
Sphagnum Moss Almost Killed My Orchids

Tags: wildlife, raccoons, eviction, repellent, animals, pest, wild animals

This is all for now,
Cecilia